Why Some Kenyan Men Stay Away From Church While Their Wives Keep Praying

According to a report by Daily Nation on Sunday, November 8, 2026, some Kenyan men have gradually withdrawn from church activities while their wives continue attending services and praying for their families.

The situation has raised questions about men’s participation in religious life, particularly in families where women and children regularly attend church without their husbands.

The reasons behind this development differ from one family to another. Some men have become disappointed by their experiences in church, while others struggle with work responsibilities, language barriers and a feeling that they no longer belong.

One of the experiences highlighted in the report is that of Peter Otieno, who gradually stopped attending church after a road accident left him using a wheelchair.

Peter explained that he previously served as a youth leader and participated in church activities. However, following his accident, he felt excluded from some activities and disappointed by the support he received when he needed assistance to rebuild his life.

Although he has stayed away from church for years, he believes that his daughter continues praying for him.

Another man, Benson Buchichi, described how language differences affected his experience after relocating to Nairobi with his wife.

He struggled to find a congregation where he felt comfortable worshipping. Eventually, his wife continued attending church with their children while he remained at home.

Benson said he supports his family’s church activities financially and believes his wife’s prayers also cover him.

Work commitments have also contributed to irregular church attendance among some men.

Bonface Musambai, a medical doctor, explained that demanding professional responsibilities sometimes prevent him from attending services regularly, although he continues supporting his family’s religious activities.

Pastor Solomon Kisakui of Communitas Christian Churches of Kenya observed that women often participate more actively in church programmes, including prayer groups and community outreach activities.

He noted that employment and business responsibilities can make it difficult for some men to participate consistently.

Religious scholar Professor Martin Njoroge also expressed concern about the consequences of fathers withdrawing from church activities.

He explained that children observe their parents’ behaviour and may eventually develop the impression that religious participation is mainly a responsibility for women.

The professor further emphasised that although wives, mothers and other family members can pray for someone, personal faith cannot be transferred from one person to another.

He encouraged churches to establish welcoming environments where men can discuss their challenges without feeling judged.

His suggestions included men’s fellowships, mentorship programmes and informal discussion groups.

The experiences highlighted in the report demonstrate that men’s absence from church cannot be explained by one reason alone. Family responsibilities, personal disappointments and the need for a stronger sense of belonging all feature in the accounts.

The discussion also raises an important question about how churches can encourage greater participation from men while supporting families whose members have different religious commitments.

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