One lover in jail, other in the grave, and the folly of uncontrolled anger

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One lover in jail, other in the grave, and the folly of uncontrolled anger By

I hope you catch my drift somehow, because today’s column is one hard write: my head is pounding like a regiment of drummers after being up all night. We got a visitor who showed up at our residence at 11pm with a short, brown, big-eared Chihuahua of the other gender. A teaspoon of a canine, with a bucket of attitude. And turns out the dog – curiously called Patience – has an opinion on just about everything and everyone she meets. As soon as she laid eyes on me, Patience decided she didn’t care much for people born in Karamoja, and proclaimed her opinion at the top of her voice – non-stop. And to wreck and ruin our night completely, a neighbour dialled emergency. So, at 3am, police, with Animal Rescue in tow, paid us a visit; clearly unhappy with us – not the irate lady canine!I’m still smarting from the sad death of ‘Afrigo’ – Moses Matovu, a national icon who, for many years, has been evidence that age is just a number. Consider the senselessness of it all: One man, the suspect, is in jail till God knows when. The other man, the victim, my dear ‘Afrigo’ is in his grave – he ain’t coming back. The [alleged] object of their affection, a real cutie whom people have easily liked, is no doubt traumatised, but will soon, I’m sure, move on and find comfort in another man’s arms. That’s how life pans out. Kampala guys are very sharp in these kinds of circumstances and will, by now, have filed their expressions of interest! You’d think with women outnumbering men by nearly two million, it really ought to be easy to cede territory in a love triangle – why, just pick any of the two million left over, instead of launching a bloody assault! Well, Ugandans don’t see things that way. It must have been late at night 3000 years ago when, quail in hand, King Solomon penned what we now recognise as Proverbs 16:32 – “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.” To King Solomon, true strength lies in mastering yourself; keeping your emotions in check and giving diplomacy a chance. A mighty warrior can conquer a city yet remain helpless before his own temper. Being slow to anger does not mean never feeling anger. It means refusing to let anger dictate your actions. Restraint requires strength, especially when pride urges you to strike.As a criminal defence attorney, I’m a regular visitor to prisons all over Uganda. And I can, with authority, tell you this: lots of people are in jail because they let anger get the better of them. I’m talking about those convicted. Uganda is a society lawless and violent! We have, over the years, departed from the pacific settlement of disputes, preferring to let pride, anger, violence, and vindictiveness dictate our responses to even the slightest of provocations. Anger, like our other baser, animal-esque impulses, finds dangerous freedom in a society that has kissed the rule of law goodbye. An argument in Bwaise over a football game in England will be settled squarely – and bloodily – with a good ol’-fashioned fist fight. A land dispute in Masaka or wherever else will be settled using big sticks and machetes. A dispute over a man will cause one woman to pour acid on another. And like we saw last week, an alleged dispute over a woman ended with my dear ‘Afrigo’ dead. When people cease to believe that the police will protect them or that the courts will deliver justice, most begin to settle grievances with their own hands. The rulers in Uganda cannot claim the credit for Uganda’s “stability” while disclaiming responsibility for the manifest decay beneath it. A good leader will preserve institutions strong enough to protect the powerless, restrain the powerful and command the confidence of both. Where citizens come to regard justice as a favour rather than a right, leadership has failed them.The less enlightened will dismiss calls for restoration of the rule of law as undue enthusiasm. Even with all the problems a lawless society presents, some think they are safe. But you never can tell when the river of lawlessness rolls its waters at your feet, in the least likely fashion and at the most inopportune time.

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