I lived in Australia for five years – here’s everything I really think about the country, what took me by surprise and why I won’t be moving back

By CINDY TRAN, ASSOCIATE EDITOR – LIFESTYLE & SHOPPING, AUSTRALIA

American expat Sophia built her ‘dream’ life in Australia for more than five years before unexpectedly moving back home to California.

During her time living in Sydney, she experienced some of the biggest culture shocks that took her the longest to adjust to – from tall poppy syndrome and Australia’s ‘nanny state’ to the freezing temperatures in winter.

‘When life had other plans and it was time to move back, I bawled my eyes out over leaving the life I had built,’ Sophia told the Daily Mail.

‘[But] like most Americans, my idea of Australia came straight from Hollywood, a sunny paradise filled with gorgeous surfers, koalas, and year-round beach weather. My first winter completely shattered that illusion.

‘I quickly realised that Sydney and Melbourne can get genuinely freezing. The biggest surprise, though, was the torrential rain and humidity. Sydney actually receives significantly more annual rainfall than famously rainy Seattle.

‘Between the howling southerly winds and massive downpours, I ended up buying more raincoats and rain boots than I ever needed in California.’

One thing that really took her by surprise was the prevalence of ‘tall poppy syndrome’, a tendency to criticise, resent or cut down successful people who often stand out from the crowd.

‘Coming from the US, especially cities like Los Angeles and New York, you’re surrounded by an unapologetic hustle culture where people openly celebrate ambition and cheer on big dreams,’ she explained.

American expat Sophia built her ‘dream’ life in Australia for more than five years before unexpectedly moving back home to California

‘In Sydney, if you stand out too much or talk too openly about big ambitions, people may judge you or feel uncomfortable. I realised that in Australia, blending in is valued far more than standing out.

‘In America, connecting people and championing someone else’s ambition is second nature, whereas in Sydney, self-promotion is viewed with a lot more scepticism. That said, I have noticed that Australians who travel extensively internationally tend to be much more open to networking and dreaming big.’

The next thing she found shocking was the ‘nanny-state’ mentality.

‘Australia is incredibly rule-abiding, but during COVID, I watched everyday citizens practically turn into neighbourhood hall monitors overnight,’ Sophia said.

‘Coming from America’s individualist mindset, having a stranger literally report my whereabouts to the police was a surreal moment I’ll never forget.

‘That hyper-vigilance carries over into everyday apartment living, too. I even had a neighbour report me to Strata just for having a dog, even though my landlord had already given me full permission.’

It’s only been a few months since she uprooted her life in Sydney and moved back to the US to be with her family – but she’s already missing a few things.

‘I wish I could bring my friends back with me to the US. Sydney has a reputation for being notoriously cliquey, but the friends I made there became my family and are truly friends for a lifetime,’ she said.

During her time living in Sydney, she experienced some of the biggest culture shocks that took her the longest to get used to – from tall poppy syndrome and Australia’s ‘nanny state’ to the freezing temperatures in winter

‘My absolute favourite things will always be the beaches, the fresh produce, and the convenience of Aussie takeaway sushi – having quick, uncut handrolls on practically every street corner is something the US needs.

‘I don’t think the rest of the world realises just how world-class Sydney’s culinary scene is, or how clean and safe the CBD is. It’s such a rich, cosmopolitan crossroads of cultures that makes the city feel very global.’

However, the one thing she doesn’t miss is the uncertainty and stress involved in trying to secure a visa pathway to permanent residency.

‘What I was least sad to leave behind was the exhausting visa grind… I definitely don’t miss the constant immigration anxiety,’ she said.

‘I truly envisioned Sydney as my forever home and pursued a Master’s degree in event management to work toward permanent residency, but the pathways for expats can be difficult and stressful.

‘Sydney will always be a really meaningful place to me, and I could absolutely see myself spending more time there. Australia will always have my heart.

‘But for where I am in my life right now, America is home for the time being.’

It’s one of the reasons Sophia decided to move back to the US, as she faced challenges trying to secure permanent residency. As she was pregnant, she also found it tricky to navigate healthcare and access certain benefits.

‘After going through what I experienced with mould-related health issues and then pregnancy while living abroad without the same level of security and support that I would have had at home, I realised, especially now that I have a child I’m responsible for, I need to be thoughtful about where I build my life,’ she said.

1. Stock up on DampRid and a good dehumidifier immediately: Sydney’s humidity is deceptive, and if you rent a ground-floor unit in a classic Art Deco building, mold will quickly become your unwanted roommate

2. Prepare yourself for the cockroaches inside your home: Sydney roaches move with Olympic-level speed compared to the sluggish ones in LA or New York

3. Learn the rules of ‘council clean-up’: When you see sidewalks overflowing with TVs, fans, desks, and couches, don’t just toss your junk on the curb too; there’s a whole scheduled system behind it

4. You will fall head-over-heels in love with the outdoor lifestyle: Sydney is one of the rare places in the world where you can grab a 10/10 meal, and 20 minutes later be hiking through gorgeous national parks or discovering hidden coastal trails. It’s truly a magical city to explore

The one thing she doesn’t miss about Australia is the uncertainty and stress involved in trying to secure a visa pathway to permanent residency

Since becoming a mum, living back at home in the US, Sophia said she’s caught herself using Aussie slang without thinking

Since becoming a mum and moving back home to the US, Sophia said she’s caught herself using Aussie slang without thinking.

‘My friends look at me like I’m crazy when I ask where to get a ‘cinnamon scroll’ instead of a cinnamon roll,’ she said.

She noticed a dramatic change in her lifestyle after relocating from the US to Sydney.

‘Living in Sydney completely transformed how I eat,’ she said.

‘Australian food culture taught me the beauty of fresh, quality produce. I learned that with a crisp head of lettuce, good olive oil, lemon, salt, and shallots, you have the best salad in the world.’

What lessons can Americans and Australians learn from each other about ambition, lifestyle, and community?

What's your view?But the biggest lifestyle change was walking.

‘In LA, driving is essential, and I was lucky if I got in 500 steps a day. After five years in Sydney, I became accustomed to taking public transit and hitting 10,000 to 12,000 steps daily,’ she said.

‘I’ve kept that routine up in the US, even if looking at suburban homes during my morning walk doesn’t quite compare to the Sydney coastline. I miss the ocean terribly.

‘I really do miss the effortless walkability and transport. I loved that I could walk from Bondi to Rose Bay, hop on a scenic ferry, and be right in the heart of the CBD.

‘Having a sparkling, clean city centre sitting right on the doorstep of gorgeous beaches is something you almost never find in the US.’

She’s noticed a dramatic change in her lifestyle since living in Australia – including eating healthier and hitting 10,000 to 12,000 steps a day

She said having a ‘sense of security’ in Australia was something she’d never take for granted

She said having a ‘sense of security’ in Australia was something she’d never take for granted.

‘In major US cities, you’re often on guard, but in Sydney, I never once felt the need to look over my shoulder, whether walking home in the evening or walking through a parking garage alone,’ she said.

‘You don’t realise how heavy that constant mental vigilance is in America until you experience living somewhere you feel genuinely secure.’

Sophia has since penned her own novel, Salt is the Cure, the first book in her Sydney Secrets series, inspired by her real-life experiences while living in Australia.

‘During my last three years in Sydney, I organised and hosted over 50 mixers and events, and I wanted to pull back the curtain on that world,’ she said.

‘International audiences often think of Australia just for its rugged outdoors, but Sydney has a luxurious, chic, and sophisticated dining scene.’

She’s currently working on her second book in her series, Right on Time.

Salt is the Cure is the first book in Sophia Kim’s Sydney Secrets series.

‘It really serves as my glamorous love letter to the city,’ she told the Daily Mail.

It’s contemporary women’s fiction packed with romance, psychological intrigue, and a budding love triangle.

The story follows Celine Williams, an American event planner making her mark in Australia, who gets entangled with a charismatic celebrity restaurateur, Jason Walker, triggering a spiral that threatens to unravel everything she’s worked so hard to build.

‘The book is inspired by my real-life experience,’ Sophia said.

Salt Is the Cure is now available on Amazon Australia.