When partners blame each others for a failed sexual encounter

Amene ajatu musamangowaona, palibe chilipo! Unamumva mmene Scott amadzitamilirira kuti ndi katsiwiri kuchipinda, iii, mhu, amwali zero pa teni. Kodi unamva kuti mwamuna was Estelle uja akutitu samamugwira olo. Akuti akudikila akwaitlane kaye, koma ndakaika. Injini inanokola amene uja kapena ndi half past six, hedee. Amuna andalama satha kuchipinda koma omwewa akafa msiyanjiwa. Imakhala ngatitu ganyu, kaya kuzolowela kuheda matumba a cementi ndiye mwina mkazinso amamutenga ngati thumba. Akutitu akunyengana ndi amakala, amuna awo ndi zilo zilotu mwezo wa folo uno. Ase Rhoda wapeza mawanua wadola komatu akuti ndikapensulo. Zoona iye uja kungokanda pamwaba. Ndi a two minutes tu oho.

The above are some topics women discuss regarding their sex escapades. I have been prompted to do a follow-up from last weeks’ entry; Sex is not a weapon to fight women with. I dissected dos and don’ts, especially the don’ts from a woman’s perspective. I was against men who glorify sex as a means of punishing a woman or boasting to others about kusinja mkazi, kugagada, kudya, kuphwasula katundu, kumminitsa kapena kumuonetsa nyenyezi. Please refer to the said article.

I am glad the entry received a lot of feedback and most men are convinced women have created this narrative by the way they equally discuss men’s performances in bed. Women demean those who don’t satisfy and being their gender, they amplify because few women don’t keep burning matters to themselves. Men sometimes wonder why a group of women turn heads in their direction and assume they should be looking exquisite. In essence, they are pointing at him as one with a ‘knocked engine’.

Look, bedroom matters cannot be entirely blamed on one party. I believe each has a role to play to experience desired results. You cannot call someone ‘kapensulo’ when in essence the speaker holds a dam. You cannot call someone half past six (inability to react to a woman) when you did not do a good job in helping the matter, (of course there are situations that cannot respond). Sometimes all that is required is proper conversation to understand each other’s needs.

It is no wonder most men opt for enhancers or aphrodisiacs. Kaya mumwa chi 5 lita chonse chanthubulo just to impress women, if you fail to impress your partner, this gender will still gossip about you. There are men dying from sex drug overdose to fit in and receive the medal of honour for proficiency, if you can’t ‘gagada’ as expected, you can’t please.

I implore both parties to look in the mirror first before pushing the blame to another gender. Learn to compromise. Inunso osinja inu, stop rushing for those on-the-counter solutions, gondolosi, nthubulo and traditional healers who promise to enlarge, delay, amend engines or bring back lost lovers before understanding how sex goes for both sides’ happiness. Mufatu. Also, avoid unzipping all over the place because it is your wife that will keep your secrets safer unless you push her to the limit. These side dishes are experimenters and surely, they will demand quite a bedroom show in spite of your wallet. Be prepared for the gossips when you jump between their sheets and don’t’ satisfy.

Look around and you will notice that those dying from such overdoses or taking sex as an Olympic competition do so outside their marital home. These men know sex outside the home is about the best man pounding harder, prompting one to master the game to beat opponents. Rarely will a man chew gondolosi to ‘punish’ wife. It is always about proving a point kuti sanathe. Mufadi.

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